My Inner World

From the time we're born, apparently, our attention is drawn outward to the world in which we live, for food, for pleasure, to fulfill obligations, for love and affection.  But, the world inside our skin, inside our minds, inside our emotions, inside our bodies is as vast and interesting as that outside our skin; and largely unexplored.

What is this attraction always away from myself?  Why is it so easy to forget to make the small effort necessary to sit with myself for a few minutes in the morning; to bring my attention back to my self and my inner world?  I've been given a practice.  I identify with the practice; and yet, I clearly prefer to disappear in all of the attractions outside myself.

Yes, disappear.  There can be days between the moments when I remember I exist and have a clear sensation of being inside my own skin in whatever time and place and circumstance.  Having experiences those moments, I know that I don't truly exist outside of those moments when I'm standing inside my own skin.  Without the wish to be there, I'm not actually typing as I am now, typing is simply taking place, often my mind is elsewhere.  I know that it's possible to drive from point A to point B and not be there in any moment during the drive.

The wish to be present is there but is often buried beneath habitual activities, thoughts and reactions; I'm usually gone; asleep.  What can I find to help me remember the wish?